Jan30
“ I hesitantly put my vibrator in my backpack because I’m going home for a few days tonight. Then in class my crush rummaged through it looking for my TI-83. Of course he found something else entirely. FML
Jan30
“ Post-graduation life sucks. I miss Lowell and homework and downtime. Note to current students: save yourselves from the drudgery and misery of corporate America. Go to grad school! FML
Jan30
“ Professor called me a dick in lecture today. FML
Jan30
“ I’ve recently realized that there’s a difference between lack of motivation and straight-up indifference. FMSeniorSpringGPA
Jan30
“ Brandon Marshall came to talk to our school 3 months ago and now he’s the Pro Bowl MVP. OLAG
Jan29
“ Considering rushing one of the frats here because I think I’ve been flirting with a guy there who might be gay but probably isn’t. I’m so desperate. FML
Jan28
“ I’ve been dating since I was fourteen. I’m exhausted! Where is he? FML
Jan28
myself
“ The girls here study too much. FML
Jan28
“ I have a crush on my neighbor. Could be convenient, but far more trouble. FML
Jan27
“ I’ve been so stressed this year that I haven’t had my period in 6 months. MLIG?
Jan27
“ It’s been five days and I already hate my roommate. Over winter break, I forgot that she sucks. FML
Jan26
“ HarvardFML posted my submission, but edited out my comedic fear that I will go from Harvard TF to visiting faculty member at Irkutsk State University. This fear is as real as water, wine, or olive oil. FHarvardFML
Jan26
“ Petra Kvitova is playing Maria Sharapova in the finals of the Aussie Open. It’s being shown live on ESPN, but my security settings won’t allow me to see it. FHarvardInternet
Jan26
“ This $55k/year is NOT WORTH IT. I would have done better to invest the $220k and retire after high school. FML
Jan26
“ I scheduled a meeting for 9 a.m. tomorrow morning. FML
